A Call To Uncle Rael (January, 1994)
Miles was out on a date with Shirley, so I figured it was a good time to call Uncle Rael and talk to him about a few things.
“Hello?”
“Hey, Uncle Rael, it’s Hen.”
“Hen! How are you?”
“Not bad. Are you busy?” I asked. This felt so odd but I had to do it.
“No, I just had a bongload and was going to listen to some music.”
I laughed. “Did I catch you at a bad time?”
He laughed. “No. I had a feeling you were going to call soon.”
“Yeah, some soap opera shit this is becoming!” I said. “My best friend is dating your girlfriend?”
“No, she’s my Beloved. She has to live her life without being totally devoted to me. That includes her dating men her age. Miles is a good guy. I’m glad Shirley will get to date him. They both deserve that connection.”
“You’re right.” I sighed.
“Do you think Shirley’s cute?” He asked, trying not to laugh.
“Honestly? Yes. But if she’s your Beloved, it’s like she’s my Aunt, right?”
He laughed. “I never even thought about that. Sorry?”
“It’s fine. It’s better to have her as a friend because I’ve never really had really close women friends.”
“Fair enough. You going to be content with that?”
“Of course! Those two really are a breath of fresh air for each other.”
“I agree. You know, it’s really strange how things between Shirley and I worked out. I know a lot of it had to do with us both mourning Mama Ruby. But she’s your age! How could I stop her from living out her college years however she sees fit? This is the first real shot at independence she’s ever had. She doesn’t have her family anymore. Of course I want to help her right now. But my folks had the same age gap and my Dad made my Mom give up her young adulthood so they could have a kid before he was 35. Mama Ruby tried to help the first few years by being around so Mom could study enough to get transcription jobs once I started school. I don’t want to be that kind of man. And its so damn cliche for a man to sweep a barely legal woman off her feet and control her for the rest of her life. That’s not my intention.”
“I know. You know better, anyway.” I laughed.
“Do I, really? The reason I smoked a joint was because I’m anxious. Miles is a great guy. What if Shirley decides she doesn’t need me anymore?”
“I doubt that’s going to happen. She’s very fond of you.”
“I know. Anxiety’s a drag. So glad the weed helps. Otherwise I’d drive her crazy and she’d leave me anyway.”
”If you can get through the college years you’ll be golden. Besides, didn’t you say not to get married until you’re over 30?”
”That’s what Anne told me when I was your age.”
“You know my parents are making me wait until 21 before I get to smoke weed?”
“It’s not legal. Plus your brain’s still growing. Use that brain for college. Ever decide on a major yet?”
“Creative writing. Maybe a French minor. I aced the AP French exam so I can get started on the minor requirements now.”
“What do Anne and Harold think about that?”
“It’s my life but I should consider making sure I have skills to get a basic office job until I make it as a writer.”
“They have a good point.”
“Yeah, I’m going to get some sort of certificate through the community college a couple miles away. A lot of it is computer-based, so those classes will be fun.”
“You’re such a great young lady, Hen. I’m glad Shirley’s got you as a friend.”
“We have a lot in common, so it’s going to be great to have a friend to go shopping and do girly things with.”
“Yeah, I don’t picture Miles going to the beauty parlor with you.” He laughed.
“So what do Anne and Harold think about you and Shirley? I didn’t think it was my place to ask them.”
“Yeah, that’s an uncle question, not a Godparent one.” He laughed. “They said that if I love her as much as I say I do, that I have to let her be a young adult.”
“That’s why you’re my cool Uncle, Rael. Even though it makes you anxious, you’re not stopping Shirley from dating Miles. They really are a great pair.”
“Thanks, Hen. I’m so glad you’re an adult now. We can finally talk like adults.”
“Yeah, the creepiness factor has gone way down.” I laughed. “Besides, a girl in high school shouldn’t start talking to a guy in his late 20’s. Even if she calls him Uncle because he used to date my Godparents.”
“When you say it that way, it makes it way creepier, especially now that I’m in my 30’s!”
“Oh, calm down.” I laughed. “I’ve read Lolita and know about Tina and Cher and Priscilla. You don’t want to exploit the age difference. That makes you a decent person.”
“Thanks. I think I’m going to fire up another joint and put on some jazz.”
“Ok, Uncle Rael, I’ll talk to you later.”
“Good-bye, Hen.”